If you come upon a traffic accident in Auckland all hell breaks loose.
Before you can say ghee what happened there? The cone men are out in full force. The entire area and several additional areas even miles away are all coned off to cause maximum inconvenience.
Eventually, fighting their way through the traffic the Police will arrive, then the towie army, perhaps an ambulance or two.
Before you know it, it’s grid lock and we all patiently wait while the police have nice we chats with people get there entire life story , take 100 photos of the surrounding houses that may have leapt out into the road the caused the accident.
Well just in case you can’t be too careful with this sort of thing. Then there are the hundreds of form to complete in triplicate.
If it is mildly serious they can add to the chaos my summoning the serious crash unit. These boys, all Police staff bought back from retirement or near death experiences because they know how to work slow, real slow.
Once we have that traffic stopped well there just can’t be any more accidents, because the traffic is all now stopped, just brilliant logic.
But if the same accident were to happen in Christchurch it is a very different story.
I was there last week moving rusty Escort bodies around the town just for light relief.
But back to the accident I saw between Escorts.
It was quite bad big black Volvo v little blue car, air bags in all directions.
I don’t know if this accident is typical of Christchurch but no cone men appear, I have been told they are all busy doing other important stuff like making roads safe during road works.
The Police cleverly turn their flashing lights off so people miles away don’t all know to stop and stare. The ambulance arrives tends to the injured at the roadside.
With 20 minutes the entire scene is cleared away and traffic is back to normal.
I am impressed, would you all please mind moving to Auckland to show them how it is done.
Sadly all of you will have to share the same house in the Tron but it is a small sacrifice for the greater good.
Crisis what crisis.